(Sung to the Kingston Trio’s  MTA)
1.    Let me tell you the story of a man named PUCKETT on a tragic and fateful day.  He was thrown in the brig for disobeying orders and escaped from the M.A.A.
Did he ever return? No he never returned, and his fate is still unlearned;
He may swim forever toward the isle of Vana Cora; He’s the man who never returned.
2.  They called all hands to General quarters;  The Exec had this to say; "We are missing a man from HATRON TWO, and we'll find him if it takes all day!" (Chorus) 
3.   They  searched the  ship from  stem to  stern, From the crow's nest to bilges, too;  While up on the bridges you could hear an awful voice shouting: "PUCKETT, where the heck are you?" (Chorus)
4.   All night long the search continued, until the break of day, but all that they found were two black shoes; Old PUCKETT had gotten away.  (Chorus)
5.   Now you citizens of Sydney, keep your eyes wide open; if old PUCKETT you should happen to see;  He stands five-foot-four in his stocking feet; and he weighs one thirty-three. (Chorus)